Friday, June 01, 2007

Right Now

Right now Ella wants me to spell everything for her. She spends the day following me around while I do dishes or laundry or all the other things that are so much fun already and adds to the fun by making it a spelling bee. Quick spell party or wait now spell giraffe o.k here's another how about Alessandra ( a classmate). The funny thing is while I should be able to spell any of her requests with ease she actually trips me up more often than you would think. It is like my brain can not process the steps to preparing a grilled cheese and how to spell yesterday at the same time. Now I have never been a great speller but these pop quizzes are really bringing my confidence down.

Right now Molly wants to wear the least amount of clothing possible. We had one nice day toward the beginning of May when Molly declared summer had arrived, that day was of course followed by a string of cold weather but Molly did not care she wanted to wear her crocs and sun dresses. Molly tells me that any shirt with a sleeve gives her a wedgie, I think she has misunderstood the definition of a wedgie? While Ella was pretty sure we were still in the throws of a Maine winter and refused to give up her wool lined boots. All of the children in her school had moved on to shoes weeks ago but not Ella. Ella who also wears a thick cotton Christmas sweater to bed over her p.j's every night even though our 1890 house has no air circulation upstairs and is about 100 degrees even when the air temperature outside is a reasonable 65 degrees. Could they be any different.

Right now I am too embarrassed to return to our regular grocery store. Let me tell you why. On Wednesday while picking up some groceries we had a bit of an incident. It started in the check out line where Molly started to display some pretty memorable faces, I asked if she needed to use the ladies room and Molly who is terrified of public restrooms stiffened and in a panic ridden voice said no she most definitely did not. I repeated this line of questioning and she convinced me she could make it home. Just as I finished paying for out groceries I saw that she was clenching her butt and making her lovely I have to poop face. I grabbed her and the cart of groceries and ran for the bathroom while she cried rather loudly "I am going to poop my pants". The cart was slowing us down so I ditched it in the produce department and grabbed Ella from the cart remembering she had begged me to let her ride in the cart so she could leave her shoes off and in the car. Great so she was going to have to walk in a public restroom with no shoes, well I had bigger problems so we continued on to the bathroom. Did I mention that Molly's outfit of choice for this day was a leotard and pirate rain boots, well as we burst in the bathroom I am trying to wrestle the leotard off but she has her butt clenched so hard it is proving more difficult than you would imagine. As I finally free her from her outfit I see that she has already started and she continues all over my pants and all over the toilet. Ella is standing behind us plugging her nose and making faces. I calmly ask Ella if she thinks she can go get mama's bag out of the cart, a look of panic crosses Ella face as she shakes her head no and I realize that is not going to happen and probably not the best idea anyway. So I strip Molly down and throw her underpants and leotard away, then I realize the situation is still pretty bad I have no baby wipes and she is filthy and my pants don't look so good either. So I do the best I can with the thin, cheap, flimsy toilet paper and come to the realization that I am going to have to walk back to the produce section with poop on my pant leg, a daughter dressed in only pirate themed rain boots with yellow poop stains that could not be removed with mere toilet paper and another daughter trailing behind barefoot. If I saw this display I can only imagine the judgemental things I would think of this mother. But since you are reading this you will realize we all survived.

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