After

And here are the afters, I went to the fabric store and found nothing at all inspirational so then I dragged the girls to Pier One and found these dish towels that I thought might work. Ella and Molly both were taken in by Pier One and there were many oohs and ahhs heard while we looked around. I do not know if has anything to do with my interest in design but it seemed unusual to me that two little girls would be so excited by a store that sells furniture and decorative items. It made me smile to hear them appreciate the rugs and the curtains making suggestions about where they would fit in around our house. It is a good thing that they were able to charm me with those memories because just a short time later as I reupholstered the chair seats it was an entirely different emotion that they provoked. You see I had set up the art easel and Molly had been painting by herself for over an hour in an entirely organized and controlled fashion. I do not know exactly what happened when Ella joined in but a few minutes later Molly ran in to the room that I was working in with red paint up to her elbows and just dripping from her little finger tips. As soon as I raised my voice Molly took off in a mad dash screaming "noooo mommy" as bright red paint was flung all over my kitchen and playroom, then bathroom where I cornered her and discovered her accomplice with another shade of paint that had been used to decorated my bathroom. My heart began to race as I scanned the room calculating the damage, the purple and red paint seeping in to the grout lines. I was quick to action stripping the girls and putting them in the shower where they both cried indignantly that they needed to get out this minute. I grabbed the shower head with my left hand and hosed them down in a fashion similar to a fireman putting out a blaze, while scrubbing at the grout with my right hand. All the while yelling " in the four and six years you have lived in this house do you not know me well enough to know this sort of thing makes mommy really mad and realllyyy crazy?" and perhaps I threw in a few " what the hell were you thinking". Ella was sobbing while Molly urged me to "use your regular voice mommy, use your regular voice". I wrapped them in towels and in a eerily quiet about to really loose it voice suggested that they might want to dress themselves and give me a few moments to get the mess under control. As I finished cleaning the bathroom I noticed the window was wide open so I can only hope that the neighborhood enjoyed their free Friday afternoon show. I then ventured in to the other rooms to survey the damage, it was not good, I will just say that I spent well over and hour just locating and cleaning paint splatter. It was not the way I wanted to start my weekend but luckily I spent the rest of my evening at a restaurant sans children laughing as I repeated the tale to my girlfriends.

Before

Notice the lovely stains

New found friendship

Ella could not have been happier to report that she had in fact sat next to Cassidy on the bus and then she had more good news to share, there was going to be a rendezvous the next day in Target in the Leapster aisle. I asked Ella what time this meeting was going to go down and she looked at the kitchen clock and said "well how about 2:00". Then I was left with the task of breaking her heart when I explained that if they had not set up a time to met then it was going to be a little hard to coordinate our arrival times. Ella was not going to let go of her play date that easily she tried to convince me it would work out, that we would surely run in to her new best friend. Then it came to her in a flash of brilliance " I know where she gets off the bus, we can walk down there and find her. She has a sticker on her bedroom window. I know we can find her!" I explained that we really could not go to the apartment complex down the road and start knocking on doors but in my own flash of brilliance suggested that we write her a note inviting her over on some future date. That seemed to appease Ella and she set to work gathering card stock, stickers and markers this was not going to be just any note. And indeed it was not just a note but a card that she carefully crafted and tweaked all weekend. She could not wait to give Cassidy the "note" on Monday ( and I had slipped my own note of introduction for Cassidy's mom just in case Ella's was a tad bit unclear). So the note has been delivered and now we wait for a call from Cassidy or her mother.

Update- It is now Thursday and we have not heard form Cassidy or her mother but surprisingly Ella has not even mentioned the play date again, and here I was wondering if her heart or spirit would be broken.

School Bus Etiquette

Perhaps I romanticized riding the bus. I remember listening to the radio on the bus, my driver liked it loud and he played the top 40 station. I remember it quite fondly the newest Duran Duran song blaring as I tried to snag my favorite seat all the way in the back where the littlest bump would send you flying 4" above the seat. Maybe the music was not even that loud but it was louder than either of my parents ever played it in the car and more importantly it was no station any other adult I knew would play. Perhaps I do not have all the facts straight seeing as I only rode the bus from Kindergarten through the third grade, so here is the reality of the bus as seen through the eyes of another 5 year old. On Monday as Ella stepped off the bus I asked my usual "how was your day?" the answer was not what I expected, mommy some one peed on the bus. Oh really, how do you know? Well there was "water" running under my feet. So we talked about how they must have really had to go to the bathroom and how it was too bad because they were probably embarrassed, she agreed so then we talked about how it was not the end of the world and what she could do if she was ever in that situation. Then today when Ella got off the bus she exclaimed guess what mommy and I asked what to which she responded "well I did not really mean to say guess what, but guess what?" How about you just tell me I nudged, well some of the boys on the bus were telling mama jokes. Mama jokes? Yeah, big mama jokes. So tell me a big mama joke Ella (I was not sure what was coming but I should have known) well one boy told another boy his mama was so big that people tripped on her booty. I burst out laughing and it was not even a good joke but something about her repeating this information was funny. After funny passed came the realization that this is just a fraction of the things she will overhear on the bus, this could be a very interesting year.

Maybe I spoke too soon?

Ella hit the wall after school today, she came home found her spot on the couch and did not move. She did not let her hair down but she felt she could not wear her underpants for one minute longer and off they came. Who knew how uptight that new school of hers really was making all those kids wear underpants and all. Actually I have no idea why she felt the need to take them off that is really not like her and when I sat down to chat with her she shared the following with me. That one little girl in her class that she had never seen before ( you know in the whole 2 days that she has been there) threw up in the sink in their classroom. And that she played on the playground with a girl who had bangs and they screamed at the boys on the slide. Now if that is not a great second day of school then I do not know what is. She was really indignant with me after bath time when reminding me that I had woken her up way too early and my daughter who went to bed all summer long between 9:00 and 10:00 was in bed sound asleep at 7:30. I am hoping that will help her prespective in the morning because before she succomed to the sleep she so desperatly needed she wimpered and cried and expressed an interest in repeating her preschool year. I really hope that she likes school for her sake and for mine or this will be a long year.

Preliminary report

After her first whole day at school I can report back that she seems to have a good day and she was able to give me a fairly detailed description of what went on with the exception of names, she could not even come up with one of those. But she amazed me with her ability to remember the littlest of details and comprehend things from another students perspective she is amazingly observant. I will have to keep that in mind as she is most likely filling away all sorts of sordid little details form her upbringing that she will no doubt use against me at a later date. And although she seems to be quite happy with her school, teacher and new friends she is most definitely the offspring of Nick and I, amazingly motivated unless of course that involves getting up early in the morning. As she sleepily ate her breakfast this morning she asked with optimism in her voice "after today do I not have to get up early?" I had to break the news to her that she in fact had to get up two more morning this week but failed to add, and perhaps for the rest of your life. She then asked if she could sleep as long as she wanted on Saturday and Sunday, and I told her of course. But we all know how that works even though she does not have to be up she probably will be up with the sun after being forced to rise every morning this week.
I am also happy to report that the girls had a wonderful time at their first ballet class. There was some hesitation on Molly's part when we first arrived, and there was the whole business of an already exhausted Ella wailing no one loves me as I rushed her off the bus and in to her tights and leotard. But when they emerged from the studio they both had big smiles on there face and wanted to share with me everything that miss Brittney had taught them. I think just seeing them in their ballet outfits would have been rewarding enough, Molly loves the way she looks in her leotard and tutu. When looking at the pictures of herself in the outfit she said dreamily I like that girl and I laughed and said that is you silly and she could not have been prouder.

And there off

Both the girls are at their respective schools as I type this. I can not be certain that I have come to grips with all of my feeling about the fact that they are both now enrolled in school. Although Molly will only be going to school two days a week for half a day so maybe the last statement is a bit dramatic. But I have had my house full of little girls noise for the past six years (almost) so it is first and foremost strange and a little disconcerting. This morning after I found myself alone in the house the first thing I did was clean up the whirlwind everyone had left behind and as I vacuumed the entire first floor without stopping and I might add with my ipod on full volume (what a luxury that was) I could not truly relish my efficiency. While signing along I kept hearing thuds or squeals like phantom children noises, maybe related to the phantom pain one feels when they loose a limb and still feel tingling or pain or itching. I remember after having Ella as I sat in my hospital room holding her in my arms I would feel kicks and movement as though she was still tucked safely inside so I asked the nurse about it alarmed that something was wrong with me. She said that nothing was wrong and that it is actually quite common that or maybe she was just trying to console a crazy first time mother. But here Ella is somehow now old enough to be whisked away on a school bus all by herself, it does not seem possible.When the bus pulled up this morning Nick said where is everyone as the bus appeared empty, that is until it started to round the corner and all these little faces were all staring out barely able to peer out over the bottom of the window. I suddenly feel as though Ella is so vulnerable and there is nothing I can do to remedy that. As I was making her lunch last night and packing it ever so carefully in her new barbie (not my choice for sure) lunchbox I fretted over it like she would be spending a week in the deep woods. I worried about if she doesn't like what I have packed and will she be starving and miserable by the time she gets home? Or is that enough juice for the whole day, I mean at home she can eat or drink whenever the mood strikes her and I am always there to make sure her needs are met. Listen to me glorify my mothering skills as if there were never times when I was swamped with work and instructed her to pick a box of cereal out of the cupboard for snack and share it with her sister. But it was still based on my judgement and my knowledge of my daughter and now Ella will be spending the majority of her waking hours with someone who hardly knows her. I know Ella will love school and this is just me feeling the pain of the first time in a series of many when she will pull away but I had honestly fooled myself in to thinking this transition wouldn't bother me in the least. So here I sit crying and typing and very proud of my smart beautiful big school girl, and her sister too who did so much better than I ever would have guessed on her first day of preschool. Last year when Ella started preschool that did not bother me at all it was a nice little break for me and in a school I had picked just for her and I know Molly will love it there too, but this whole kindergarten thing is much bigger than I expected.
*Disclaimer- may not make as much sense I thought when I was writing it because I was being an emotional sap!